When is it acceptable to punch a child in the face?

[GreenyUK]

no you can be arrested with a bat if your not carrying the ball .
I find I have never needed a weapon really just go in hard and fast, if your worried about the guy go for the knees. Never kick high, knee high either with the toe of the boot to the bottom of the knee cap moving upwards or the sole of your boot to the side of the knee and always push through when you kick.
If the guy isn't on the floor after that you have done it wrong

Always kick with my shin dude it'll break others peoples bones like small sticks. And the average guy wouldn't see a head coming he wake up in hospital hours later like what drokk happened lmao.
That why Muay Thai rules

I must admit I wish we could stun guns over here they would be so much fun haha

[mercutio]

no you can be arrested with a bat if your not carrying the ball .
I find I have never needed a weapon really just go in hard and fast, if your worried about the guy go for the knees. Never kick high, knee high either with the toe of the boot to the bottom of the knee cap moving upwards or the sole of your boot to the side of the knee and always push through when you kick.
If the guy isn't on the floor after that you have done it wrong

Always kick with my shin dude it'll break others peoples bones like small sticks. And the average guy wouldn't see a head coming he wake up in hospital hours later like what drokk happened lmao.
That why Muay Thai rules

I must admit I wish we could stun guns over here they would be so much fun haha

always loved watching muay thai but even shins break on the sole of my boot and headbutts are dangerous if the guy leans forward rather than pulling away

[Sailor]

A spud gun with ice pellets. Leaves a wet bruise. Works on cats.

[paul bristol uk]

Mrs Greeny Cost depends on two things one the part of Bristol you live in and two Is there a Costco near so your subbies can get cheap cider.

[Fons[DutchGuy]]

Jup would take the biggest lad of them al and take him for a hell off a ride to his parents home (make sure to apply plastics on passenger seat to protect from bodily fluids). Drag his sorry ass to his mum/dad and make sure to them that next time I catch him I will leave my marks with some 3ft piping before returning him again

[simonc]

According to the law ( instituted by SimonC) it is ALWAYS acceptable to punch (or inflict pain of any kind you choose) on a horrible child/youth given the following set of circumstances have occurred. Please use this handy cut out and keep check-list. As long as one of the following criteria have been met you are within your rights to use whatever painful force you think fit.
1: They have ginger hair. (This also includes stupid haircuts - I leave that for you to judge what you consider stupid)
2: They are 'named' Conor, Katelin, Kieren, Kale, Kiera, Chardonnay, Chelsea, Lee, Wayne, Sharon, Dale or any nickname that involves a z in their name.
3: They are overweight.
4: They eat while walking down the road. (McDonald's / Greggs or any other such fast-food junk)
5: They swear.
6: They spit.
7: They're ugly. (physically and mentally)
8: They're just plain irritating to be in visual range.
9: They come within 10 feet of anything you own (including house, car, bike, baby-stroller, garden wall etc.)
10: They have 'parents' that are obviously as loathsome/ignorant/stupid/troublesome/violent/insolent/overweight/ugly as them.

This is the law so please feel free to Tazer the little bastards ( and while you're at it), if you can track down their 'parents', (suggest first checking for them in a nearby Greggs / Pub / Betting emporium / Dole office / Council office where they're looking for handouts of some sort etc), Tazer those horrible slobs as well.

I'm sure you'll feel a whole lot better and at least you know you'll have taught the thuggish little bastards a lesson in respect for the sanctity of other people's property.

[simonc]

Sorry - forgot to mention. If they are wearing tracksuits (or whatever they call them these days) a baseball cap that worn back to front or any kind of shirt boasting of a Premier League affiliation then you are within your rights to increase the Tazer voltage to 'Maximum and beyond setting'. Aim for the groin to ensure total pain infliction satisfaction on your part.

[MrsGreeny]

Mrs Greeny Cost depends on two things one the part of Bristol you live in and two Is there a Costco near so your subbies can get cheap cider.

I'm actually the nicer side of Bristol would you believe lol

According to the law ( instituted by SimonC) it is ALWAYS acceptable to punch (or inflict pain of any kind you choose) on a horrible child/youth given the following set of circumstances have occurred. Please use this handy cut out and keep check-list. As long as one of the following criteria have been met you are within your rights to use whatever painful force you think fit.
1: They have ginger hair. (This also includes stupid haircuts - I leave that for you to judge what you consider stupid)
2: They are 'named' Conor, Katelin, Kieren, Kale, Kiera, Chardonnay, Chelsea, Lee, Wayne, Sharon, Dale or any nickname that involves a z in their name.
3: They are overweight.
4: They eat while walking down the road. (McDonald's / Greggs or any other such fast-food junk)
5: They swear.
6: They spit.
7: They're ugly. (physically and mentally)
8: They're just plain irritating to be in visual range.
9: They come within 10 feet of anything you own (including house, car, bike, baby-stroller, garden wall etc.)
10: They have 'parents' that are obviously as loathsome/ignorant/stupid/troublesome/violent/insolent/overweight/ugly as them.

This is the law so please feel free to Tazer the little bastards ( and while you're at it), if you can track down their 'parents', (suggest first checking for them in a nearby Greggs / Pub / Betting emporium / Dole office / Council office where they're looking for handouts of some sort etc), Tazer those horrible slobs as well.

I'm sure you'll feel a whole lot better and at least you know you'll have taught the thuggish little bastards a lesson in respect for the sanctity of other people's property.

Didn't see your name on the ballet paper but you get my vote

[Donald]

Could be worse, you could've gone out to your car this morning to find the passenger door and rear quarter keyed

[Donald]

Yep.

At least the quarter is a non issue - it's rusty anyway so is due to be replaced.

Still jobby though!